It’s interesting how when you say no you can be perceived in so many ways.
You can be viewed as…
“Oh my goodness I can’t believe that mean woman said no to me.”
The mentality here is entitlement. Some people just think everyone should do what they want lol.
You can be viewed as….
SELFISH (a different version of the villain but still basically the same)
“What a selfish person they are, all I asked for was…”
The mentality here is still entitlement but in this case they are judging you and making you out to be bad/mean/wrong for not doing what they wanted you to do (so controlling lol).
Or you can be viewed as…
A HUMAN BEING.
“Oh I guess this just doesn’t work for them right now, or isn’t the right time.”
This is healthy. When you say no, it’s just because something isn’t a fit…not because you are a bad guy.
So if anyone in your life is trying to manipulate you into feeling guilt when you say no, get rid of them.
They suck butt holes. Yes I said that. They literally suck butt holes and smell like poop.
And nobody wants poopy people around.
So then you can ask yourself, what is my agenda in saying yes at the expense of myself? What do I need right now? What am I trying to achieve.
Therein lies your clarity and awareness as to what’s really driving you.
Let me know how this goes for you. xoxo.