Striving vs. Thriving
I feel like this is the greatest lesson of my life, and part of the purpose of this blog is to commemorate it for ME (so that I don’t go mindless and forget), so thank you for reading and holding the space for my growth. You rock.
Most of my life has been spent making moves to attain happiness (I am clearly obsessed – I have made a career out of it lol).
Often times the thought process was that the road to happiness is freedom. So naturally I would focus on making more money as an entrepreneur in order to attain that freedom, love, connection, success, etc.
I am now clear that this is counterproductive.
I know that sounds illogical, but hear me out.
I am currently on the cusp of mastering this so I am still making sense of it. But here is the clarity I am coming to…
WHEN YOU ARE STRIVING FOR SOMETHING, YOU ARE PUSHING IT AWAY.
I know that seems weird because we think we need to try for stuff to make it happen (and we do to some degree) but just don’t try TOO hard lol.
Up until this point I have been pretty obsessed with information around masculine and feminine energy. How one chases and one magnetizes and how they both work symbiotically.
I have mostly consumed this information in reference to relationships, and I can honestly say I feel like a master in the art of relationships.
What I know to be true in this area is that two people displaying masculine energy will be in competition with one another and therefore repel each other and two feminines don’t have enough magnetism between them to stay connected.
We see this day in and day out with men and women in the dating world. A woman finds herself taking care of a man thinking she is mothering or being sweet. What she doesn’t understand is that mothering is masculine as fuck.
It doesn’t get more masculine than that. I am the boss at home, I take care of my children’s needs, wipe their buts because they NEED me to.
If I behaved that way toward Kenny when we were dating I would have emasculated him and pushed him away.
Women do this every day with the men they date. I could go on for days about this subject, but that’s a whole other seminar lol. This blog is about magnetizing money and success so back to the point lol.
When you work too hard to get someone to like you in matters of the heart you end up repelling them.
It is the same with money and success. I never applied this in the area of money and success because I felt that in this area of life it was appropriate for me to display masculine chasing energy. Though through experience I have found the complete opposite to be true.
I am not sure what drives you, but I believe that personality type is a factor here as well with what type of energy you can display in your business to attain monetary success.
Some people get off on the chase, while I myself find it to be exhausting and create burn out. I am the personality type that needs everything to be fun, and low pressure to thrive. Not everyone is like this so this may not apply to you.
You be the judge of that.
But if you are the type who thrives under low pressure shining bright when it’s not expected…then keep reading. Here is what I have to say…
Let it go.
Surrender to what is.
To who you are.
To what you want.
To what makes you tick.
And build a life that is in sync with that.
For the longest as a life coach I have struggled with the fact that I don’t like the formal nature and schedule that comes along with coaching. I don’t want to sit at a desk for 8 hours straight talking to clients. I don’t want to schedule a nanny and be at the mercy of them possibly calling out sick and therefore being viewed as unreliable as a result of having to cancel client appointments.
All of this led me to tell myself that I didn’t want to coach clients one on one.
The truth is I love helping people. I love supporting them in where their heart wants them to go. Helping them break out of limitations such that they create the life of their dreams. I mother freaking love it.
Add in the beauracracy, the formality, the schedule, the nanny cost, the unpredictability of life and I am completely shut down.
So I finally came to terms with the fact that I am a freedom whore.
I want to coach people, and help them live their ideal life, and I want to do whatever I want whenever I want however I want.
This plagued me for the longest. So I stopped coaching. Then I started to think, how can I help people in a way that gives me what I want too?
So I found it. I am now doing on demand life coaching. It’s an affordable version of coaching, using a walkie talkie app where the client can hit me up whenever via audio message, and I can reply (within 72 hours) on my own time.
I don’t have to sit at a desk, I don’t have to hire a nanny, and I don’t have to show up at a certain time or date in a certain mood. I get to do it when I want, how I want, where I want…
So now guess what. I am getting so many people who want me to coach them. My income has doubled in the last WEEK out of no where. Just from giving myself permission to chill the fuck out, stop pushing, fully accept who I truly am, and do it in a way that honors my desires.
It feels a little bit like that magic bullshit they talk about in the secret or the law of attraction. lol.
I truly think it’s a direct result of me saying NO to things that don’t feel good.
No more “shoulding” on yourself peeps.
Do what you want.
Joseph Campbell says, “Follow your bliss and the universe will open doors for you where there were only walls.”
So what is your bliss? If you stopped thinking within your current circumstances for a bit…and started to play in the area of imagining and visioning your ideal experience…what would come through?
If you need help with this (because it’s too hard to get out of your head) hollar at me and I’ll support you with a visioning session. I got your back. Xo.